• Navigating Male Fertility Challenges as a Couple

    Couple discussing fertility issues.

    Infertility is a Shared Problem

    About one in six couples globally struggles with infertility. While this is often considered a female issue, approximately 40 percent of infertility cases in the United States are connected with male infertility, making it, most definitely, a couple’s issue. While both partners experience emotional distress and relationship stress, the perceived social stigma regarding male infertility and, indeed, male emotional response to infertility, make it challenging for men to find support. Here, we offer advice for couples navigating male fertility challenges.

    Men Have Feelings Too

    Let’s just start by stating the obvious. Boys and men are conditioned by society to avoid vulnerability, hide their feelings, and be strong, no matter what, but that doesn’t mean their feelings don’t matter. Infertility and pregnancy loss are very painful experiences, and can deeply affect a person’s mental health. It can be hard to process this very private kind of trauma, but infertility is definitely painful. Feelings men experience as a result of infertility can include:

    • A deep sense of loss and grief can accompany the knowledge of an inability to conceive a child.
    • Guilt and shame can result from not living up to societal expectations of virility and fertility.
    • Men sometimes experience a sense of inadequacy, feeling they’ve failed their partner.
    • It can feel isolating to experience infertility, and men feeling the pressure to be strong and stoic may not feel able to ask for support.
    • Anger and frustration are natural when dealing with infertility, especially because it’s easy to feel powerless when faced with failed attempts, the inability to find a specific reason for infertility, or seemingly endless fertility treatments.
    • Anxiety and depression are common for both partners experiencing infertility, as financial strain mounts, disappointments recur, and the future seems uncertain.

    Navigating Infertility as a Couple

    While men may have difficulty expressing their emotions, and may feel the need to be strong for their partners, the truth is that infertility is a shared concern. Like many things in a partnership, it is best addressed together, working as a team. How can you work together to overcome the mental and emotional challenges of infertility?

    • Talk about it. Communication is important in a relationship, and it is crucial during challenging times or periods of stress. It can be hard to talk about difficult topics, but if you can start out with talking about thoughts it can be easier to segue into talking about emotions, too. Make sure that each partner is spending equal time listening and being heard, be honest with each other, and keep it a safe space, where you can each express difficult thoughts and emotions without judgement. Make sure not to rush these conversations, but carve out time for each other and really listen.
    • Don’t neglect other aspects of your life. Infertility can feel all-consuming, but it’s important not to let it overwhelm your life. Make time for fun, go out on dates, play games, and spend time with friends and family. Take time out from fertility drama and make sure that other parts of your life don’t fall by the wayside. Spending light-hearted time together can help alleviate the stress you’re experiencing.
    • Learn as a couple. There are plenty of resources for those experiencing infertility, but there is also plenty of misinformation floating around. It is important to know how to separate fact from fiction, and to educate yourselves together. It can be hard to find good resources, which is why it is so important to contact a fertility specialist to help you identify solutions that are good options for you.
    • Share responsibilities. Make infertility treatment a team effort. Keeping up with all the medical appointments, medication, and bills can be overwhelming, but it’s less so when you’re both shouldering the responsibility.
    • Have clear boundaries. Talk to your partner more than you talk to other people. If you are going to share information with friends of family members, make sure your partner is on board with it before you do it. It is important to have support, but it’s also important to protect your partner’s privacy.
    • Seek outside support. While you need clear boundaries, you also need a safe space to share what is happening. Joining a fertility support group where you can interact with others who understand what you’re going through, can be a good way to keep from feeling isolated. Support groups can be in-person or online, and they offer a safe, friendly environment in which to discuss difficult topics.
    • Don’t equate infertility with failure. Whether or not you conceive, it doesn’t change who you are as a couple. Fertility is not a reflection on your relationship, and infertility is just one of the challenges you will face in your life together. By keeping communication strong, you can also strengthen your relationship and more easily navigate future challenges.

    How Men Can Protect their Mental Health

    • Express your emotions. Don’t feel you always have to be strong and stoic. Talk to your partner and find others to talk to as well, who will listen supportively.
    • Distract yourself. Plan a weekend getaway, go hiking, take a trip, or just go out to dinner at a new restaurant. You and your partner need things to do that don’t have anything to do with fertility.
    • Find support. Whether it’s a support group, a counselor, or a trusted friend or family member, think about who you want to turn to when things are tough. Make a list for yourself of people you can call when you need support.
    • Manage stress. Maybe it’s engaging in hobbies you enjoy, or maybe it’s meditation or listening to music. Whatever helps you feel less anxious, more grounded, and happier is good for managing your stress.
    • Remember who you are. Infertility doesn’t define you, and it doesn’t define your relationship. Look at old photos, reminisce with your partner, embrace new hobbies, and remind yourself that infertility is just something you’re going through, and not who you are.

    Seek Help From Fertility Experts

    If you are having trouble conceiving a child, help is available to you. At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • How to Help When Your Partner is Having a Hard Time Breastfeeding

    Father supporting mother who is about to breastfeed

    Father supporting mother who is about to breastfeed

    The Gift of Breastfeeding

    Breastfeeding is a wonderful gift to give a baby. By providing your baby with nutritious, natural breastmilk, your partner is protecting not only the baby’s health, but also her own. Breastfeeding helps keep the baby healthy, boosting immunity to help prevent infection and disease, and it reduces the mom’s risk of diseases like osteoporosis and certain cancers. By breastfeeding your baby, your partner is saving your family money, bonding with your little one, and boosting your child’s brain development. All of that is truly amazing, but it should be noted that breastfeeding is not always easy. In fact, for some women, it is not possible. What can you do to support your partner through this process and help her to reach her breastfeeding goals. We have a few suggestions.

    Have the Right Attitude

    Learn as much as you can about breastfeeding and take the stance that you and your partner are in this together. Sometimes, dads get jealous of the closeness of the mother and baby during this special time, or feel left out. Don’t fall into this line of thinking; there are plenty of things you can do with your baby! Avoid hovering, but communicate with your partner and let her know that you are there for her if she needs anything.

    Understand the Issues

    Breastfeeding is not for the faint of heart. It does not always come naturally, and sometimes there are real challenges, even when the mom has learned as much as she can and is eager to breastfeed. Sometimes the baby refuses the breast or bites, and other times there’s not enough supply to keep the baby well-fed and healthy. When there is too much milk, the breasts become engorged and sore. It can get very uncomfortable, in many different ways. Nipples can get sore and infected, milk ducts can become blocked, and mastitis or even breast abscesses can occur. Your partner can get support from a lactation consultant, her doctor, a nurse, or a midwife, but it’s also important for you to provide support as well.

    Being There for Your Partner

    Supporting your partner with breastfeeding starts in the hospital. Often, hospitals will push formula, and you may need to be your wife’s advocate and help her make her breastfeeding intentions clear.  If your partner needs your assistance enlisting the help of a nurse or lactation consultant, be prepared to seek out the right person for her. At home, she’ll need you to step up your game around the house, taking on some extra chores so that she can have the time and space for breastfeeding. Offer to bring her a snack or some water, or an extra pillow, and help minimize distractions by removing pets and older kids from the room and limiting visitors. Understand that breastfeeding is physically demanding and help your partner to get some rest. Be aware that she may not want to be touched after a long day of caring for a newborn, and don’t be hurt if she is a bit distance. This is a short time in the grand scheme of things, and your lives will reach a new normal soon.

    Bond with Your Baby

    Just because the baby is breastfeeding, this doesn’t mean the daddy won’t have the opportunity to bond with this new little person. Cuddle your baby skin to skin or carry him or her in a sling or baby carrier. Offer to do bath time because this can be a wonderful way to bond. Settle your baby during fussy moments, which might be easier for you than your partner because you won’t have the smell of milk on your body to distract your baby. Offer to burp the baby or change the diaper after a breastfeeding session. Make the most of the times your baby is awake and alert, and spend time playing or walking with your child.

    Be Supportive, No Matter What

    For some families, breastfeeding goes smoothly and is a very rewarding experience. For others, though, it does not work out as well. Encourage your partner every step of the way, defending her choices to any naysayers and being there for her when she needs you. If breastfeeding does not turn out to be an option, be sensitive. Let her know that you don’t see this as a failure and you support her choices, no matter what.

    Supporting Families and Helping Men

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428. For additional parenting tips, we invite you to check out our other blogs!

  • Prostate Health Month

    Prostate Cancer Awareness

    Prostate Cancer Awareness

    September is Prostate Cancer Awareness Month

    About one in 9 men in the United States will be diagnosed with prostate cancer during his lifetime, making it the second most common cancer, after skin cancer. Like many cancers, though, it can be treated successfully if detected early. In September, Prostate Cancer Awareness Month, and November, Men’s Health Awareness Month, we want to spread awareness to help men take better care of their health.

    Prostate Screenings are Important

    Men often get a little bit nervous about prostate exams, because the doctor must perform a digital rectal exam (DRE). This involves inserting a gloved finger into the rectum to feel the prostate’s surface, as well as examining the lower rectum and assessing the function of the anal sphincter. These exams are necessary, though, and people assigned male at birth should start having them around age 45 or 50, depending on their level of risk. In addition to the DRE, a prostate screening involves a PSA blood test, which measures the level of prostate-specific antigen in the blood.

    What to Expect from a Prostate Exam

    You don’t have to do much to prepare before a prostate exam, but you should let your doctor know if you have any issues like hemorrhoids, anal tears, or anal fissures. You’ll also need to abstain from sex for 48 hours before the exam, because ejaculation can cause your PSA levels to temporarily increase, and this can affect the test results. You don’t need to change your bathroom habits or be nervous if you haven’t defecated, because your doctor is used to this type of exam.

    Doctors perform the two different types of screenings because, while a PSA blood test is very effective for detecting prostate cancer, the DRE can find cancer in people with normal PSA levels. During the DRE, your doctor will feel for lumps and bumps on the back portion of the prostate, where many cancers start. This exam only takes a few seconds, and while it may be uncomfortable, it’s not usually painful. The PSA is just a simple blood draw, sent to the lab for analysis. It only takes about a day to get the results, and if the PSA level is high, you may need further testing to diagnose prostate cancer, like a prostate biopsy, MRI, or other lab tests.

    A Healthy Lifestyle can Help Protect Your Prostate

    Prostate screenings are important for protecting your prostate health, because prostate cancer doesn’t always cause symptoms. They’re not the only measure you can take to keep your prostate healthy. Following these healthy living tips will help not only with your prostate health, but also with your overall well-being.

    • Watch your weight. Prostate cancer is just one of the many health issues linked to obesity.
    • Eat your veggies. Vegetables, especially dark, leafy greens, are important for prostate health. The vitamins and minerals found in foods like Romaine lettuce, spinach, kale, and broccoli are vital for a healthy prostate.
    • Cut back on red meat. Heavy consumption of red meat can increase your risk of prostate cancer, but eating it on special occasions only will reduce your risk.
    • Understand your risk. Talk to your doctor about your risk level; high risk groups include African Americans, those of Scandinavian descent, and people with a family history of prostate cancer.
    • Get regular exercise. Exercising for 30 minutes a day at a moderate pace can have a preventive effect on many health issues, including prostate health.
    • Drink plenty of water. The recommended amount of water for proper hydration is at least eight cups of water daily, and more if it’s hot or you’re very active.
    • Manage your stress. Long-term stress weakens the immune system and alters your hormonal balance, increasing your risk of disease. Strategies like mindfulness and meditation can help with stress management.
    • Don’t smoke. Smoking causes carbon monoxide to attack your red blood cells, increasing your risk of prostate cancer and other diseases. If you are having trouble quitting, talk to your doctor.

    Center for Vasectomy Reversal Cares About Men’s Health

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, men’s health is our priority. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their health and fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

     

  • How to Pick Godparents

    Godparents playing with Godchild

    Godparents playing with Godchild

    Picking Godparents: A Weighty Decision

    When you’re having a child, there are so many decisions to be made. How will you decorate the nursery? What will you name your new little one? But one of the most important decisions you’ll make is the choice of godparents. What is a godparent? For some people, it’s a religious designation, but it doesn’t have to be. A godparent is an adult friend, an adviser, and another person in the child’s life to serve as a watchful eye and listening ear.

    What does godparent mean to you?

    In Christianity, a godparent acts as a sponsor when a baby receives the sacrament of Baptism into the family’s faith. Traditionally, parents would choose two godparents who share their faith, to help the child grow and be strengthened in the knowledge of God. Families who are not religious can still choose godparents, just to give their child good adult role models and further support in life. In this case, parents can pick as many godparents as they want. Godparents may be a strong religious force in a child’s life, or they may just be a source of love and support for the family.

    Are godparents legal guardians?

    It’s a common misconception that godparents are assigned to take custody of the child if something happens to the parents. This is not the case, though you can specify in your will that your child’s godparents will take this role. The act of making them godparents does not, in and of itself, designate them as guardians. It’s more about choosing someone who shares your sensibilities, to help you guide the child through life.

    Choosing Godparents

    In the Catholic church, the rules regarding godparents are strict. Godparents must be chosen by the parents or guardian, cannot be the child’s mother or father, and must be at least 16 years old. They must be Christians, and at least one must be a Catholic. Outside of the Catholic church, however, the choice is pretty much up to you as a parent. Choose carefully, because this is as much a responsibility as it is an honor. Think about the attributes this person has that you’d like to see passed along to your child. Consider how their influence will affect your little one as he or she grows to adulthood. Look for someone who is a permanent fixture in your life, someone reliable, who you would trust to pass along your beliefs if you were gone. When you’re narrowing down your list, talk seriously with potential godparents, making sure each is aware of your expectations. Don’t let peer pressure or family politics come into play; choose the people you believe will be the possible godparents for your child.

    How to Ask Someone to Be a Godparent

    Again, when you are a member of a Catholic Church, there are more requirements. Some parishes require a letter of recommendation from the godparent, along with documentation of their church membership and their understanding of this important role. If you are not a Catholic, you have a little bit more flexibility, but it’s nice to ask before the child s born. Look for a way to make the moment memorable, perhaps with a heartfelt card or personalized gift.

    Celebrating with the Godparents

    The sacrament of Baptism is a celebration in and of itself, but the birth of every baby is a celebratory event! There is no one way to mark the occasion, so you have near endless opportunity to make it uniquely you. A party in which you welcome your new little one into the world and honor the people you’ve chosen to be godparents can be a fun and memorable event, but there are other ways to observe this important moment, too. You could plant a tree with the godparents or bury a time capsule for the child to find in a decade or two. You might also ask the godparents to write letters to the baby for the child to read later in life.

    Bringing New Life Into the World

    The birth of a baby is a joyous and momentous event, and we at Center for Vasectomy Reversal love having the opportunity to help people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • What is Cradle Cap?

    What is on your baby’s scalp?

    It happens to most new parents, and it can be disconcerting. You’re snuggling your sweet new baby, inhaling that delicious baby smell, when you notice something a bit, well, icky. Red scaly or crusty yellow patches disrupt the sweet softness of your infant’s scalp, blotch your baby’s beautiful face, or appear in the diaper area. What is that? It’s cradle cap, and here’s what you need to know about it.

    Cradle Cap is a Common Condition

    Cradle cap is scientifically known as seborrheic dermatitis, and it can develop when a baby is between two and 12 months old. Generally, it starts on the scalp, as red or yellow patches that are greasy, scaly, or flaky, but it can also start on the face or in the diaper area, armpits, or any other place where the skin folds and creases. In creases and folds like the neck or behind the ears, it appears red and moist. It may look uncomfortable, but it doesn’t typically bother infants. Unlike atopic dermatitis, it is not itchy.

    Causes of Cradle Cap

    No one really knows what causes cradle cap, but it’s probably more than one thing. Oil buildup in the oil glands and hair follicles, combined with yeast found on the skin, play roles in its development. It is also thought that hormones passed along from the mother to the child before birth can contribute to the formation of cradle cap. What is known is that it is not the result of poor hygiene, and it is not contagious. A doctor can diagnose cradle cap by looking at it, and it will generally get better whether it’s treated or not. However, you might want to treat it, just to get those scales off of your baby’s scalp.

    Treating Cradle Cap

    Sometimes, cradle cap can be prevented with daily hair washing. Wash your baby’s scalp with a mild, tear-free shampoo, and remove the scales with a soft brush or toothbrush. If the scales are too stubborn for gentle shampoo, try a bit of baby oil, mineral oil, or olive oil, allowing the oil to soak into the scales so that you can loosen them with a soft brush. Once you’ve done that shampoo as usual. Be careful not to use any shampoos with nut oil on a child under five years of age.

    Does cradle cap require a doctor visit?

    If the cradle cap won’t clear up with regular shampooing, you might want to ask your pediatrician for help. He or she might recommend a mild steroid cream or antifungal shampoo, or a cream for parts of the body other than the scalp. Don’t use any over-the-counter anti-seborrhea shampoos, steroids, or antifungal creams on your baby without asking your doctor first. In some cases, seborrheic dermatitis in skin folds or the diaper area can get infected. If you notice signs of infection, like warm, red skin or fluid draining, call the pediatrician. Usually, though, cradle cap and seborrheic dermatitis clear up by 12 months of age, but may come back during puberty as dandruff.

    Healthy Babies Start with Healthy Parents

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428. For more parenting tips, click on the link to our blogs!

  • Push Present Ideas

    Happy man giving partner a push present.

    Have you heard the term “push present”? If you are soon to be a father, it’s a term worth learning. A push present is a gift the new father gives the new mother to thank her for all she’s done and congratulate her on their new little family member. While there is no greater gift than your precious newborn baby, a push present is a sentimental gift meant to show your partner your love, support, and appreciation. While the baby is a gift to the father, too, dads don’t generally receive push presents because they don’t carry and deliver the babies. If the mom wants to honor the dad with a gift, it’s a sweet idea, but for now, we will focus on dad gifting to mom. Need some ideas for the perfect push present? We’ve got you covered.

    If you don’t care for the term push present, it should be noted that this kind of gift can also be called a “baby bauble.” Don’t think, though, that that means it necessarily needs to be jewelry. The gift you give to the new mother can be whatever you know will be meaningful to her, and it doesn’t have to be extravagant or expensive.  Jewelry is traditional, but a keepsake, a splurge on something useful, a cool high-tech gift, or a subscription to a service that will benefit her.

    If you’re considering jewelry, think about the mom’s personality. Is she the sentimental type, who would want a piece of jewelry with her child’s birthstone, birthdate, or name on it? Consider stackable birthstone rings, that can be worn by themselves or with more rings when more children are born. Another option would be a necklace, bracelet, or ring with the child’s name inscribed, a necklace symbolic of motherhood, or a baby-focused charm for an existing bracelet. If she isn’t the type to wear “mommy” jewelry and would prefer something classic and timeless, consider diamond earrings or a beautiful bracelet.

    For moms who are not into jewelry, consider something that’s practical but still a bit of a luxury. It could be sateen sheets, a silk pillowcase, comfy pajamas or a soft robe, a high-quality espresso maker, or a designer handbag. Would she enjoy a special keepsake? A baby book, newborn photo shoot, or even a piece of art made from a tracing of your baby’s heartbeat in utero are all unique gifts. A tech-loving new mom might like a smart watch, an e-reader, or a hands-free smart device to control other devices in the house.  Or you might consider a subscription. Audible gives mom something to listen to while she’s feeding, rocking, or walking the floor, Bouqs or Bloomsy will flowers every month to remind her she’s loved and appreciated, Stitch Fix will help her build a post-baby wardrobe, and there are digital scrapbooks like Qeepsake to help new parents store memories they’ll treasure later. Of course, a spa gift certificate can also be a welcome gift.

    How will you present your gift? This can be a big part of the fun. One sweet idea is to wrap the gift and set it in the top of the overnight bag she’s packed for the hospital. Then you can encourage her to double check the bag to make sure she has everything, and enjoy her surprise when she finds the gift you’ve thoughtfully chosen. This moment can become something special between you as you grow your family.

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • Everything You Need to Know About Cervix Dilation Stages

    Happy man holding his pregnant partner’s hand.

    The body goes through many extraordinary changes during pregnancy, labor, and delivery, but one of the most amazing is cervical dilation. Do you understand this process? It starts a few weeks before the baby arrives, and the cervix becomes fully dilated during the final stage of labor. When a woman is labor, terms will be tossed around like cervical effacement and dilation, which are both terms referring to the cervix. Here’s a guide to help you understand the stages of cervical dilation.

    The three stages of labor are latent, active, and delivery. The cervix is the lowest part of the uterus, which opens to allow a baby to pass through. That opening is called dilation, and active labor doesn’t start until a woman is about five to six centimeters dilated. To deliver a baby, the cervix must be fully effaced, which means thin, and dilated- (opened) to 10 centimeters. The effacement begins before the dilation, as a cervix must be fully effaced to dilate. The healthcare provider will begin checking the dilation of the cervix during the final few office visits by doing a cervical exam and will check it several times during labor. Let’s examine the stages of labor and how the cervix progresses.

    • The first stage of labor has two phases: latent and active. Together, these two phases vary in duration, and last longer in first time mothers than in women who have already had a baby.
      • The latent stage is primarily waiting. In fact, for first time moms, it can last a long time before anything seems to happen. During this phase, contractions are not strong or regular, and the cervix is getting shorter and softer, beginning to open.
      • The active stage of labor once the cervix has dilated to about five or six centimeters. Contractions at this point are longer, stronger, and closer together than they were in the latent phase. The active stage ends when the cervix is 10 cm dilated. While one centimeter is about the size of a blueberry, 10 is about the size of a bagel. If the cervix isn’t dilating properly, the doctor may try some different tactics to speed the process.
    • The second stage of labor begins when the cervix is fully dilated. This doesn’t mean the baby is coming immediately, because the baby may not be in the right position yet. Once the baby has moved down the birth canal fully, it will be time to push. The pushing phase can last for minutes or hours, depending on whether or not the baby is delivered with just a few pushes. First time moms and women who have had epidurals may need to spend a longer time pushing. During this time, the mother will be encouraged to change positions, squat, and rest between contractions. If the baby is not progressing, the doctor may need to employ forceps, a vacuum, or a Caesarean delivery, depending on the health of the mom and baby, the hospital policy, and the doctor’s own discretion. The second stage is over when the baby has been delivered.
    • The third stage of labor happens when the baby has already been born. This may seem strange, but it’s an important stage. This is when the woman delivers the placenta, which is a completely separate organ formed during the pregnancy. Once the baby is born, the placenta must be expelled, since it is no longer needed. Contractions continue, and while they are not as strong as the ones in the second stage, they are enough to expel the placenta, usually with just one push. This stage lasts between five and 30 minutes, and is hastened if the mother begins breastfeeding the baby. After birth, it takes the cervix about six weeks to return to normal.

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • What is Parentification?

    Daughter consoling stressed father.

    The role of the parent and child are typically well-defined, right? The parent is the caretaker, with the child focusing all his or her energy on growing and developing. That’s the normal way of things, but sometimes, these roles are reversed, and the child becomes the caretaker. This phenomenon is called parentification, and it is detrimental to children, causing long-term negative effects on their emotional and mental wellbeing. Here, we discuss parentification, explaining what it is, why it’s not good, and how to spot the warning signs.

    • What are the types of parentification? In a healthy parent-child relationship, the parent cares for the child, but parentification happens when the parent relies inappropriately on the child. The two types of parentification are emotional and instrumental.
      • Emotional parentification is when the child provides excessive emotional support to the parent. Acting in the capacity of a therapist, the child listens to the parent’s troubles, reassures and soothes them, and gives advice. Children placed into this position by emotional parentification keep their parent’s secrets, comfort their siblings during conflicts, and try to diffuse negative situations. They stifle their own pain in the interest of taking care of their parents and siblings emotionally.
      • Instrumental parentification involves children taking on adult responsibilities. While it is appropriate for children to help around the house, instrumental parentification occurs when children must do the weekly grocery shopping, cook, clean, manage finances, or take responsibility for their siblings in a way that serves the parent more than the children. The tasks are often beyond the child’s level of ability and comprehension. Sometimes, this parentification is sibling-focused, particularly if a child is tasked with caring for a sibling with a disability or chronic illness. To determine whether the things being asked of a child amount to parentification, look at whose needs are being met and whether the demands are age-appropriate. Doing chores and helping with younger siblings can help build a child’s confidence and abilities, but parentification is harmful to children.
    • How does this happen? When the parent is experiencing physical or emotional impairment, whether it’s an addiction, a disability, or a physical or mental illness, it impedes the parent’s ability to be a reliable and predictable caretaker. Unexpected life events and financial hardship can also lead the parent to lean on a child too much, but sometimes, parentification is simply the result of neglect. Children step up to take responsibilities that are inappropriate for their age and level of development because they want to keep the family functioning.
    • How is this harmful to children? Children who are parentified often suppress their own needs and emotions, discerning that there is only room for one person’s needs in their relationship. They can grow up to have problems with relationships, choosing self-centered partners because they are more comfortable with this known dynamic. They experience fear of abandonment or rejection, and they may develop mental health issues, experiencing issues like anxiety, depression, substance abuse disorders, and so on. The silver lining in all this is that children who have experienced parentification are often extremely emotionally intelligent, responsible, organized, and empathetic.
    • What are the symptoms of parentification? When a child is relied upon too heavily by a parent, the child may show signs of self-doubt, difficulty being assertive, a strong desire to please other people, guilt, depression, stress, and anxiety. The child may have difficulties at school and show signs of a loss of childhood. Physical symptoms with no known source may manifest, like stomach aches or headaches, and the child may act out at school. Teenagers may use substances to self-medicate. In the long term, people who have experienced parentification may have trust issues, and they are at an increased risk of mental and physical health issues. Parentified children often become codependent adults.
    • How can one overcome parentification? It can help to see a mental health professional to overcome the negative effects of parentification. While recognizing parentification and treating the child early is best, adults who experienced this phenomenon in childhood can also benefit from the help of a mental health professional. Overcoming the negative effects of parentification is especially important in helping people establish new patterns so that they can build their own healthy, happy family.

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • The Most Common Illnesses Children Face

    Father taking care of sick child.

    Our children are such a gift to us! Precious and adorable, they light up our lives with their sweet little faces and loving hearts. Unfortunately, they are also unbelievably germy. Any parent of a young child has no doubt had that horrifying moment when their cute little sweetheart rolls on the floor in public, picks up something off the ground and pops it right into his or her mouth, or licks a handrail. They seem determined to touch everything, and while this is just a natural part of childish curiosity, it’s also a great way to pick up the viruses and bacteria that bring on childhood illnesses. Add to this the fact that children’s immune systems are not as strong as they will be later, because they have not yet built up immunity, throw in some interaction with other children at daycare or playgroups, and it’s no wonder that some kids seem to just stay sick. It helps to know the facts about some common illnesses, so that you will know how to manage them, and which ones warrant a trip to the pediatrician. Here, we discuss some of the most common illnesses children face.

    • The common cold can strike kids about five times a year. The mild fever, congestion, sore throat, and cough that come along with it should be treated with fluids and rest, and if your child is uncomfortable, you can give children’s ibuprofen or acetaminophen if your pediatrician approves. It is best not to give a child cough and cold medicines, because it’s easy to give a child too much.
    • Little ones are most vulnerable to RSV. Respiratory syncytial virus is a common childhood illness that affects the lungs. Most of the time, it’s just a minor respiratory illness with cold-like symptoms like coughing, sneezing, runny nose, and fever. However, it can be extremely serious for young infants, preemies, children with compromised immune systems, chronic lung disease, or a congenital heart condition, as well as elderly adults. About 150,000 children are hospitalized each year because of RSV, so it is vital to call your pediatrician immediately if you notice your child wheezing, breathing quickly or with difficulty, refusing to drink, appearing lethargic, or starting to develop a bluish color on the lips and in the mouth.
    • Roseola also impacts the smallest kids. Sometimes, this illness is so minor that it is completely overlooked. For some children, though, it leads to a high fever, congestion, coughing, and a patchy rash that starts on the chest and spreads. Fortunately, it almost always ends quickly, and usually only occurs in those younger than two years old. If your child’s fever spikes or last longer than three days, seek medical attention. Otherwise, you can treat roseola at home with children’s ibuprofen. Roseola is contagious, so keep a child with this illness home until the rash is completely gone.
    • Gastroenteritis is commonly known as a stomach bug. Many different viruses can cause this illness, including norovirus, and it comes with vomiting, diarrhea, and abdominal pain. Generally, there’s not much you can do except give some TLC and encourage the child to rest until it subsides, usually within a few days to a week. Give plenty of fluids because gastroenteritis can easily lead to dehydration.
    • The Coxsackievirus is also called Hand-Foot-Mouth disease. This virus, which occurs mainly during summer and fall, is extremely contagious, spread through touch, coughing, sneezing, and fecal matter. It is not particularly serious, but it is very uncomfortable, causing skin rash, fever, mouth sores, flu-like symptoms, and sometimes blisters on the hands and feet. There’s not much to do for a child with Coxsackievirus except to make him or her comfortable with ibuprofen or acetaminophen, with ice pops and non-acidic juice to ease the sore throat. Pay close attention, though, because kids often don’t want to drink due to the sore throat, and this can lead to dehydration.
    • Fifth disease is also called Slapped Cheek syndrome. Most common in children three and under, it causes a bright-red rash on the cheeks, and sometimes a mild fever, runny nose, and secondary rash on the torso. It’s very contagious until the rash erupts. It subsides on its own, but if your child develops joint pain, let the doctor know, and if you are pregnant and your child develops fifth disease, talk to your ob-gyn about the risks of complications.
    • Strep rarely affects small children. If a baby or toddler contracts strep throat, it’s typically because an older sibling has it. However, your child can also get strep throat through interaction with a child who has it, or even by playing with a toy an infected child has been using. Caused by the bacteria streptococcus pyogenes, strep can cause sore throat, fever, swollen tonsils, and stomach pain. Your pediatrician can run a strep test and provide your child with antibiotics.
    • Influenza is the official name of the flu. Having the flu is miserable, with symptoms like headache, sore throat, high fever, cough, and sometimes even vomiting or having diarrhea. Fortunately, you can greatly decrease your child’s risk of contracting influenza through the use of flu vaccines.
    • Conjunctivitis is commonly known as pink eye. It is extremely contagious, and spread through your entire household very quickly, causing redness, yellowish discharge, crusty eyes, and blurry vision. It’s very uncomfortable as well as contagious, and in young kids, almost always caused by a bacterial infection. Your pediatrician can prescribe antibiotic eye drops, and the child should be careful to wash hands and avoid sharing hand towels, wash cloths, pillows and blankets to avoid infecting others in your home.
    • Pinworms are the result of poor hygiene. If you’re unfamiliar with these parasites, and they sound disgusting to you because of the word “worms,” you are on to something. Unlike ringworm, which is a fungus, pinworms are actual worms that get into kids’ digestive systems when they don’t wash their hands. These nasty little bugs move down the digestive system and lay eggs around the anus, which causes itching. If you notice your child scratching his or her bottom, talk to your pediatrician. The doctor can give you a special tape to put on the area at night and bring back in to be analyzed for pinworms and their eggs. They can be treated with a dose or two of prescription medication, but you will have to wash the towels and bedding in hot water to completely eradicate them from your home.
    • Kids get more ear infections than adults do. In fact, an ear infection is one of the most common childhood illnesses. Caused by bacterial or viral infections, they cause ear pain, irritability, trouble sleeping, tugging on the ear, and a fever.
    • Bronchitis often follows an upper respiratory infection. Occurring when the airways in the lungs swell and produce mucus, bronchitis causes soreness in the chest, body aches, a sore throat, headaches, and fatigue. It’s typically caused by a virus, and the best treatment is rest, fluids, and sleeping with a humidifier in the room.
    • Sinusitis means a sinus infection. It’s caused when fluid builds up in the sinuses and allows viruses and bacteria to grow. It can be very uncomfortable, with runny or stuffy nose, headache, pressure or pain in the face, sore throat, cough, bad breath, and post nasal drip, but should resolve on its own.

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we love helping people grow their families. We pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.

  • Pimples on Your Testicles and When You Should Be Concerned

    Pimples are problematic, wherever they occur, but a pimple on your testicles can be particularly troublesome. Given that pimples can happen anywhere on your body, it’s not surprising that they could happen down there, but are they a cause for concern? Can you treat them at home, or do you need to see a doctor? Most importantly, how can you keep them from coming back?

    What makes your scrotum susceptible to pimples? Some of the common causes of pimples are ingrown hairs and pore blockage, and since that area contains many hair follicles and pores, it is a welcoming environment for pimples. Unfortunately, sometimes a pimple is more than a pimple. In some cases, it could be a sign of a sexually transmitted infection (STI) or another infectious condition. How can you tell the difference?

    If you’ve got a pimple, it will be red or discolored, and may have pus in the center. Pimples with white pus in the center are called whiteheads, while clogged pores that look black are a type of pimple called a blackhead. Sometimes pimples occur on their own, but they can also cluster, especially on your scrotum, where it’s moist, sweaty, and rubs against your clothing. Pimples that occur there are typically either due to an infected hair follicle or the build-up of skin oil. While those pimples are not a big deal, you should seek medical attention if you notice pain or itching around the pimple, pain when urinating, inflammation of the testicles or scrotum, sores on your penis, thighs, anus, or buttocks, large blisters that burst, large patches of red or white bumps, swelling in the genital area, hard lumps in your testicles, or discharge from your penis. These could be signs of an STI or a serious condition, like cancer.

    If you just have a regular pimple, or even a bunch of them, you can usually treat them at home. Don’t apply acne medication like you’d put on your face, because the skin around your genitals is very sensitive. Never pop a pimple, no matter where it is located; this can cause the breakout to get worse. Instead, apply a warm, wet washcloth to the area for 20 minutes, four times a day. If you’d like, you can put two drops of tea tree oil on the washcloth, and this will help clean the area of oils. A dot of castor oil on the pimple can help reduce infection, and so can using gentle soap and a washcloth to clean around it when you shower. You can also mix corn starch with water and apply this paste to the pimple to help dry it, or use an antibacterial cream or ointment to help clear out bacteria and fungi. If the pimples don’t go away or at least look better after several days of treating them at home, see a doctor.

    How can you prevent pimples on your testicles? Keep the area clean by bathing or showering at least once every day or two, and use corn starch or a powder to keep the area dry. Wear underwear made of natural materials like cotton to allow air flow, and refrain from wearing tight clothing. Don’t tweeze, pluck, or wax hair in the genital area, and if you engage in some manscaping, pay attention to see whether it causes a flare up of pimples. Practice safe sex, to protect yourself from exposure to bacteria and viruses.

    At the Center for Vasectomy Reversal, we are concerned with every aspect of men’s health, and we pride ourselves on helping men improve their fertility through uncompromising, concierge-level patient care. Under the direction of Dr. Joshua Green, our team provides state-of-the-art treatment for men who need a reversal of their vasectomy or have other fertility concerns. To learn more, contact us through our website or call 941-894-6428.